I detest
dressing up. when I say dressing up, I mean a variety of things. I mean to say
that when I dress as female, I am not stared at. When I dress as male, I am not
stared at lustfully. Its like the difference between picking peas and carrots
if you hate vegetables. Its the difference between being called dyke or slut,
its like getting a broken nose or a broken hymen. I'm either heckled by men
looking for a fight or heckled by men looking for a fuck. Sometimes its both.
For the most part, its neither, but there's always one dickhead that's had a few
too many drinks and feels the need to say hes gonna ‘fuck me straight’ or that
he has the right to touch me in a highly inappropriate way. See, i'm not like most
girls. I know and understand how daunting it is to have to approach females.
Its hard, putting yourself out there and chatting someone up. Its not only
daunting, but incredibly annoying when buying girls drinks to have them swan
off with someone else. Ahh, the mistakes of youth...but still. i cant help but
feel insulted when a guy thinks okay to bump into me and grope my tits in the
process. I have no qualms with being objectified or stared at by men when i'm in
a club. I'm not a crazy feminist. I'm in a revealing dress and i'm tipsy, and
while its fundamentally wrong to think ‘shes asking for it’, most people do go
out clubbing for a ‘good time’, whatever you want that to mean.
So if a guy offers to buy me a drink, I politely decline, and if they are too persistent I tell them that i'm taken and they understand and leave. Job done. If i'm on a particularly mad one with a mad group of friends then i might accept a drink from a guy and at least kiss him out of decency, but my point is, in a club its hot, its sweaty, there's a lot of randy fellas, its a straight bar, and there's not much room; I expect the odd grope here and there. I expect distinctively male hands in distinctively personal places, even if they don’t mean to. there's a certain social etiquette that if someone wants to get across the dance floor and i'm in their way then they can run their hand across my lower back, waist and rear at a push in order to shimmy past me. If i'm being chatted up, then they might try to do those same things as they talk to me. but to lunge towards me and squeeze my chest with both hands under the pretense of bumping into me insults my intelligence, and my ability to hold my drink. I might also add that my intelligence and drink threshold is a lot higher in me than that one guy. Because I know its certainly not all guys, not even most guys. If ever there was a time to call upon my friends very well put phrase ‘this reflects badly on my gender’ then it would be now. That guy was a douche.
So if a guy offers to buy me a drink, I politely decline, and if they are too persistent I tell them that i'm taken and they understand and leave. Job done. If i'm on a particularly mad one with a mad group of friends then i might accept a drink from a guy and at least kiss him out of decency, but my point is, in a club its hot, its sweaty, there's a lot of randy fellas, its a straight bar, and there's not much room; I expect the odd grope here and there. I expect distinctively male hands in distinctively personal places, even if they don’t mean to. there's a certain social etiquette that if someone wants to get across the dance floor and i'm in their way then they can run their hand across my lower back, waist and rear at a push in order to shimmy past me. If i'm being chatted up, then they might try to do those same things as they talk to me. but to lunge towards me and squeeze my chest with both hands under the pretense of bumping into me insults my intelligence, and my ability to hold my drink. I might also add that my intelligence and drink threshold is a lot higher in me than that one guy. Because I know its certainly not all guys, not even most guys. If ever there was a time to call upon my friends very well put phrase ‘this reflects badly on my gender’ then it would be now. That guy was a douche.
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